When my daughter reached school age, her bedtime routine changed sometimes. We did the usual, cuddles, reading, prayers, but sometimes things that happened during the day were still on her mind. That’s when I guided her into blowing Stress Bubbles.

Stress bubbles are just like blowing bubble-gum bubbles, but then they float away from your mind like balloons.

Here’s how to blow a Stress Bubble:

1. Take a deep breath in through your nose.

2. Breathe out through your mouth and imagine you are blowing a bubble-gum bubble. It can be as big as you want. Picking a color for the bubble will help guide your vision

3. Imagine your stressor going into the bubble.

• Into the bubble goes that hurtful thing someone said.

• Into the bubble goes your worry that it might be true.

• Into the bubble goes who that person is.

• Into the person goes your fear that they don’t like you.

• Into the bubble goes the embarrassment you felt.

• Into the bubble go the people who were around and didn’t stick up for you.

4. When you run out of breath and your imaginary bubble is nice and big and round, imagine it floating away from you like a balloon, up into the air, and carrying that upsetting event and thought far, far away from you.

5. Now imagine the sun, moon, or stars shining on you. Feeling warm from the light. Feel it surrounding you as you relax your body. It is a bubble of protection keeping you safe.

If you need extra support a sleep story on the Calm app or on YouTube is good for kids and adults or listen to a cozy audiobook (my recommendations for grown ups). The point is to stop the messy thoughts so you can rest.

Wouldn’t it be nice if this were a magical cure for all worry that ails us? It’s not, but it will help soothe your mind and ease your heart. And if it’s a healthy way of managing snowball thoughts.

As parents, it can be helpful to our own peace of mind to give our child a tool to manage the things we can’t fix. Parental empathy can hurt! We feel what our children feel so deeply.

May tomorrow be better. Sweet dreams, my friend.

Like what you read? Make me smile by hitting the heart button, and check out these similar articles.

• Creating a Sleep Bliss Bubble

• What to Do When a Shame Attack Hits

• Feel Cringey and Do It Anyway

Imagine yourself in a Bliss Bubble, now relaaaaaax into a world faaaaaaar away from the cares of your day.

At this point in my day, I’ve completed my Evening Rest Rituals, set up my Sleep Bliss Bubble, now I can immerse my mind into a tale of comforting visuals, inspirational ideas, and charming characters.

Ever since I started listening to audiobooks while trying to sleep, I’ve had very few nights when I can’t shut off my mind. It feels like magic. My thoughts are redirected to imagining myself in beautiful settings, but the topic has to be just right.

Let me be clear in saying these books are not boring, they’re just calm and familiar—especially when I listen to them again and again and again.

Did you know you can get audiobooks from your library? Check out the Libby or Hoopla apps.

Here are the ingredients for my idea cozy audiobook:

Atmospheric or …

Stories that are centered around a place, whether it’s a country, a farm, or a city, will recount vivid descriptions of scenery, spaces, and homes that taps the imagination. The more I am imagining a place, the more distracted I am from whatever stress is trying to steal my peace.

This makes expat stories or travel memoirs my absolute favorite cozy genre. Stories about people trading the city to a bucolic existence also satisfies. Real life is always more interesting to me than fiction.

Inspiring

If I’m not following a story about a traveler finding herself in a far away land or an expat settling into a charming countryside village, then programming my mind for personal development is also relaxing. I love books on habits and work productivity, but those aren’t the best for separating my mind from my day.

Some examples of gentle personal development audiobooks include:

• The Untethered Soul by Michael A. Singer

• Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

• The Path Made Clear by Oprah Winfrey

• Wishes Fulfilled by Wayne Dyer

Nothing truly terrible happens.

Every good story has conflict/resolution or the classic Hero’s Journey, but it needs to be situational, light, or funny for my sleepy audiobook. Conflicts should consist of a stubborn animal or quirky local, a culture shock, minor travel snafus, or the woe of renovating a cottage in an idyllic setting.

• The Rural Diaries by Hilarie Burton

• Only in Naples by Katherine Wilson

• A Moveable Feast by Earnest Hemingway

• The Year of Living Danishly by Helen Russell (Substack)

• Paris Letters by Janice MacLeod (Substack)

• My (Part-Time) Paris Life by Lisa Anselmo (Substack) Note, Lisa is grieving her mother in this book, but she transforms her grief into pursuing her dreams. It didn’t feel too heavy for me.

Assurance of no really bad stuff can be hard to find, and I’ve certainly been jolted from my Sleep Bliss Bubble by a car crash or detailed pig slaughter. Sometimes you can skip to the next chapter, but other times, the story descends away from coziness and into real drama–and that’s when I usually move on to a repeatable, favorite story.

Repeatable, favorite stories.

Some of my audiobooks have achieved a Pavlov’s dog honor for serving as a peaceful sleep guarantee. I turn it on, relax into the tale, and my subconscious knows it’s time to rest.

These repeatable favorites are where I turn when another audiobook hasn’t quieted my thoughts. I think to myself, “Time to bring in the big guns,” which, while cringey to admit, is the absolute truth of my dorky inner dialog.

• Anything by Frances Mayes (Substack); she’s best known for Under the Tuscan Sun, but she has several calm and relaxing books about Italy and beyond.

• Anything by Janine Marsh (Substack); my all-time favorite for her classic British humor and warmth.

I’m running out of happy travel and expat memoirs, and I’ve wondered if I might enjoy the cozy mystery genre; maybe something on a train?

The Calm app also has sleep stories I love; The Arctic Cruise story does the trick every time!

Recommendations for cozy audiobooks are welcome!

Leave a comment

Related articles you might enjoy:

• Morning Reset Rituals

• Evening Rest Rituals

• Creating a Sleep Bliss Bubble

Product photo from Amazon

Feelings deserve to be acknowledged, nurtured, and explored, but not when it’s time for rest and sleep. We all need rest, so bedtime’s not the time to feel my feelings. (That’s what my Morning Reset Rituals are for.)

Audiobooks have been the key to shutting off unhelpful thoughts or Shame Attacks to allow my mind and body to rest for a better day tomorrow.

First, I shut down the day with my Evening Rest Rituals. Spritz some lavender water on my pillow and prepare to play dead.

Playing Dead

On days when I’m overstimulated and simply cannot muster another ounce of energy for anyone or anything, I head to bed a little early whether I’m sleepy or not and play dead.

Playing dead means I turn in when it’s close enough to bed time to be passable and just want to be left alone. I announce to the fam that I’m going to bed, then I snuggle down with my audiobook and pretend to sleep. Usually, I’m undisturbed. Well, sometimes.

No Interruptions

I play audiobooks on my iPad, which doesn’t have anything for work or phone notifications. I never look at texts, emails, social media, or my calendar on my iPad. I only use it for entertainment and relaxation, and I put my phone out of sight.

Headband-style Headphones

A comfortable headphone/sleep-mask combo is key, and since I”m a side sleeper, a head-band style with flat speakers is best. These are easy to find on Amazon like the one pictured above, and the cost ranges from $15-40.

I can’t recommend specific headphones because I’ve bought at least five over the years (they don’t last forever). They all had plus and minus signs on the control panel, but not all of them had volume control. This is key: you need to be able to adjust the volume without moving from a comfortable position. I suggest reading the reviews to find out.

They’re also amazing for creating a Bliss Bubble during travel whether you’re on a plane or to create a home-like sleep environment in a hotel.

Sleep Timer

I’m a light sleeper, so I set the sleep timer. I think all audiobook players have sleep timers, but this is something to think about it you enjoy sleeping to music or podcasts.

I come from a long line of sleep listeners. My Granmary (maternal grandmother) listened to talk radio all night long; my mom did the same until podcasts came onto the scene. As for me, the sound will wake me back up if the sleep timer isn’t set.

Okay, the Bliss Bubble is set, in my next article I’ll describe the types of books that make peaceful “reads.”

Read: My Ingredients for a Cozy Audiobook (with Recommendations)

Related articles you might enjoy:

• Morning Reset Rituals

• Evening Rest Rituals

• Ease Your Mind by Blowing Stress Bubbles

I laughed too loud, said too much, or said something to the wrong person. These could jolt me into a Shame Attack. It’s such a visceral experience that I physically recoil.

It might be a time when my vulnerability was rejected, misunderstood, or judged. Shame-attack prevention makes me want to stay small and quiet.

(Side note, when someone is judgey, it’s the clearest sign that they are not my people. I note that takeaway and make connections elsewhere.)

Shame Attacks aren’t the big, classically embarrassing moments for me. I’m more forgiving of myself with those. Fall on my face in front of a crowd? I brush it off.

Sometimes, there’s something I can learn from the situation, a reminder to be slower to speak, for example. But most of the time, it’s a blatantly unhelpful slap in the face for something that I cannot change because it’s in the past, forgivable, and most always, years ago.

Shame Attacks tend to hit in quiet moments. The middle of the night. Driving. Waiting in an elevator. During meditation.

It growls to me, “You were really stupid when ….” or “Remember when that very important person looked at you funny after you said ….”

They’re never the big, classically embarrassing moments. They are the small, seemingly insignificant gaffes that likely no one remembers except for me.

To live with creative expression, I have to learn to cope with shame attacks. That’s because you cannot live creatively without authenticity. And with authenticity comes people who just don’t get you. Those are not our people.

As the saying goes, you can be the sweetest juiciest peach in the world, and there will still be people who hate peaches.

That’s easy to understand, harder to put into practice.

I’ve developed a little mindfulness practice for coping with Shame Attacks:

1. I allow myself to relive the memory—honestly, I don’t think I could stop myself.

2. Once I realize I’ve spiraled, I name it. “Okay, I’m having a Shame Attack.”

3. Then, I forgive myself for being human. Humans make mistakes. A lot of mistakes. I remind myself that people are never thinking about me as much as I am thinking about me. Sometimes this leads me to another memory replay. If so, I try to stop myself.

4. Take a deep breath and redirect my thoughts to anything else. If there’s nothing I can do or learn from the situation, reliving it isn’t helpful. The point here is to interrupt the spiral of unhelpful thoughts by any means necessary. Get up and move, turn on something to listen to (audiobooks at night are perfect), or scroll if necessary.

Does it go away? Usually not for the long term, but it’s a healthy practice for the moment and puts the Shame Attack in its place.

For persistent Shame Attacks, journaling about the situation is freeing and works every time. I’m not always near my journal or in a situation where I can scroll pensively, so that’s when the emergency self-forgiveness is needed.

Journaling has allowed me to truly release the shame and move on from the memory, a little wiser, a little better, and feeling lighter.

Like what you read? Here are a few more posts on making space to create:

• Feeling Stuck? It’s Not You. It’s Resistance.

• Feel Cringey and Do It Anyway

The Andy Warhol Diaries aren’t actually journals in the traditional sense.

The diaries were delivered by phone call to his assistance and eventual book editor, Pat Hackett. They started out as a way for him to track deductible expenses, but they evolved into juicy, and sometimes scandalous detail.

Gossip lovers of the 1980s gleefully pored over the pages in the book’s post-mortem release. Stars and socialites who were shamed in its pages were less pleased.

Since I’m fascinated by artists and how they live and work, The Andy Warhol Diaries are a natural curiosity for me. If you’ve ever dreamed of dancing to disco at Studio 54, you might enjoy them, too.

• Use voice notes.
  Like Andy, if writing doesn’t work for you, use voice notes. Journaling is nothing more than getting your thoughts off your mind. Do what works for you.

• Journal even if it’s boring.
  Many of Andy’s entries are quite plain. It describes places he went, meetings, appointments, riding in taxis—average activities that any working person can relate to.

• Note your date and location.
  It’s interesting when Andy notes when he is someplace other than Manhattan. Los Angeles, Paris, Houston, Monte Carlo, Palm Beach are some of the places named. When looking back at journal entries, knowing where you were physically helps ground you in the memory.

• Use first and last names.
  Unless it was one of Andy’s regulars, he noted the first and last name. As you get older, it’s surprising how names will escape you. Including first and last names of people you encounter will help jog your memory.

• Record your expenses.
  As I mentioned above, the whole diary project began as a way of tracking Andy’s expenses for tax deduction, mostly cab fare. If you’re on a budget and journal regularly, why not add your expenses?

• Stay consistent(ish).
  The Andy Warhol Diaries span 1976 to 1987. He doesn’t have an entry for every day. If that’s okay for one of the greatest artists of all time, it’s okay for you, too.

• Indulge in gossip.
  Better than repeating it (or publishing it in a book!), our journals are a safe place to vent, gripe, or say things you’d never say out loud. Then you can enjoy your own scandalous retelling when you are old and gray and far, far away from the drama.

Related posts you might enjoy:

• The Artist or the Art? Which Interests You More?

• Feel Cringey and Do It Anyway

• 5 Steps that Helped Me Finish The Artist’s Way

Resistance is procrastination, a mental block. It’s getting in your own way. Being your own worst enemy.

It’s also fear. Fear of failure. Fear of being seen. Fear of being cringey.

It’s excuses. An endless, sweeping array of very compelling, logical, practical reasons you simply can’t continue.

It’s hitting the snooze button. Forgetting your shoes for your workout. Not planning ahead. Yep, that’s Resistance, too.

It’s also that feeling when enthusiasm wanes and drudgery sets in. It reminds you over and over, “You can quit at any time.”

Resistance is oh so tricky. It’s the easy path. “Stay in bed,” it whispers. Avoid risks. Skip flossing. Keep scrolling. Don’t put yourself out there. It feels good in the moment.

Resistance gives you permission to avoid the very thing you need and want to do.

But you know what? Resistance kind of loses its power once you give it a name.

If it’s good for you, you can count on Resistance to show up. That means, you can plan ahead, recognize it when it shows up, and be ready to fight.

The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles by Steven Pressfield taught me everything I need to know about capital-R Resistance.

The book is written with creative work in mind, but just like my philosophy for Creative Adjacency, creativity comes in many forms. Resistance will ALWAYS show up, whether it’s a creative project, trying something new, building a healthy habit, or reaching the finish line for anything.

The War of Art is only 165 pages broken up into three “books” (which are more like chapters) of quick essays that explain Resistance and how to fight it.

1. Resistance: Defining the Enemy
   This part teaches us how to identify Resistances in its many, tricky forms.

2. Combating Resistance

   Learn how to be a professional, not an amateur.

3. Beyond Resistance: The Higher Realm

   Call upon a muse or angels–however you define them–to support you on your journey.

Now that you have a name for the enemy, do you feel empowered to keep going? How does Resistance show up for you?

Leave a comment

• Want to read more about Resistance read: Feel Cringey and Do It Anyway.

• Here’s one where a famous muse helped me overcome a writing block: Start with One True Sentence.

As we are all in on Analog 2026, the Pocket Notebook enters the chat.

One night I was deep in a YouTube journaling + productivity + personal development rabbit hole, when I stumbled on a brilliant concept: the Pocket Notebook.

I didn’t note the original creator (ahem, that would have been a perfect use case for the Pocket Notebook), but search the term and you will enter an endless stream of delicious notebook content.

The idea is simple, you keep a small notebook handy to jot down anything that comes to mind. It’s different from a Common Place Book, which is a more organized, curated collection.

I didn’t have a name for it at the time, but I used to keep a Pocket Notebook in my car for jotting down anything that I needed to remember, ideas, or concepts I heard on a podcast or audiobook that I wanted to explore.

As I’ve grown more dependent on my phone, I’ve fallen off the tried and true method for miscellany.

For me, any small notebook could do, but as a notebook enthusiast, I have criteria:

1. It must be small, like 3X5ish

2. It must be inexpensive for guilt-free tossing around.

3. It must be pliable and squishy. No hard cover.

My current Pocket Notebook is a miniature composition notebook (pictured above) that came in a set of three at the dollar store. I couldn’t resist its cuteness even though I had no need nor plans for another notebook.

Like the composition notebook I use for my journal, it’s perfectly non-special.

I use a crisp Sterling Ink Common Planner as my daily bible, but it’s helpful to have another place to add dates on the go.

If you want your own Pocket Notebook, here two other brands I’ve used. I can’t show you my old notebooks because I transferred any important info over to my Common Place Book, and I think I threw them away. Blasphemy!

Field Notes has character and style. Thin and portable, it’s an ideal Pocket Notebook.

Moleskine has plenty of pages and beautiful color choices to capture all your brilliant moments on the go.

What do you think? Would a Pocket Notebook help you spend less time on your phone and more time thinking, dreaming, and planning?

Leave a comment

Like what you read? Check out these related posts.

• 2026 is the Return to Analog

• The Artist or the Art?

Everyone is a potential friend to me. I see the best in people. Vulnerability comes naturally. I’m happy to see everyone. I want everyone to feel like they belong. Everyone is included.

I have a big heart that not everyone deserves.

In fact, you have to be kind of a jerk or give off bad vibes for me to NOT like you. And even then, I’ll try to withhold judgement for the first bad encounter. “They’re just having a bad day,” I tell myself.

You have to work to make me not like you. It’s all standard Golden Retriever energy.

On the flip side, I can gloss over people’s red flags. You have to make me not like you, so I am not always a good judge of character. I can be too forgiving.

When I was a teenager, I read The Rules, the 1990s bible for dating and relationships that basically espouses playing hard to get–a tactic that served me well in my dating years decades ago.

I remember thinking, “I need to be the mysterious quiet one,” a laughable idea if you know me.

Robert Greene’s book The 48 Laws of Power, #6 “Create an Air of Mystery” echoes this idea.I read this book because I needed to be aware of manipulative games other people might be playing.

Golden Retrievers can be easy targets for deceptive people playing power games.

As I get older, the Black Cat energy is coming more naturally to me because I am tired.

Here’s how I’m bringing more Black Cat energy this year:

• Believing the vibes I’m getting from people.

• Trusting my intuitive pings.

• Listening more deeply and being slower to speak.

• Allowing gaps in conversation, especially when I’ve asked a question.

• Smiling more when it feels natural; less when I want to put someone else at ease.

• Pursuing my personal style.

• Sharing personal information only when it serves me.

• Thinking something funny without sharing it. Saving the giggle for myself.

• Protecting my time, energy, and attention.

I’m very comfortable with who I am and my Golden Retriever tendencies, but a bit of Black Cat energy will give me a better balance.

Are you a Golden Retriever or Black Cat? How do you find balance?

Leave a comment

Because Tik Tok is my drug of choice, I discovered the idea of an Analog Bag from Siece Campbell. Now Hobby Bags/Analog Bags/House Purses are becoming popular in my corner of the Internet, and I am locked in!

Whatever you call it, having a place to store and carry your analog hobbies makes it more likely you’ll reach for them.

Here are some of the ways the people of the Internet are putting down their phones and reaching for something tangible, tactile, and calming.

Community

Experts say modern society is sorely missing the sacred third-place. Not work or home, but a place of community where you belong.

Let’s create our third place in 2026.

• In-person gatherings with like-minded community such a book clubs, game nights, or casual dinner parties

• Pictures from a regular digital camera or Polaroid (My teen and her friends have discovered digital camera, and it’s such a novelty for them.)

• Real letters and stationery; thank you notes

• A restaurant or coffee shop where you’re known as a regular. (I want mine to be a yoga studio).

• In-person classes whether it’s auditing a community college course (in Dallas County, it’s free for residents), joining a one-time workshop, or a limited series of classes.

Entertainment

Remember the 90s, I lived for magazines and never failed to entertain myself with stacks and stacks of them.

• Library books and the luxury of browsing the shelves.

• Well-worn used books where you can note, highlight, and turn down corners with abandon.

• Crossword puzzles, Sudoku, and word-search books.

• Print magazines and newspapers (I am currently loving my print subscriptions to Vogue and Vanity Fair.)

• Jigsaw puzzles (I especially enjoy seasonal puzzles for anyone to contribute at any time.)

• A “Curriculum,” this is where you go down a rabbit hole researching, exploring, and learning about something that has sparked your curiosity. Might I recommend The Artist’s Way?

Crafty and Creative

Spending less time consuming and more time creating is a priority for me in 2026. That’s why I started this Substack.

• A stash of your favorite pens or a new-found appreciation for fountain pens. Thrift stores always have pencil cases to keep your tools organized (like my silver one pictured)

• A fresh set of markers or colored pencils.

• Coloring books.

• Pictures from a digital camera or Poloroid.

• Post-it notes (I love plain white and kraft paper.)

• Stickers–just for the fun of it.

• Knitting, crochet (I don’t actually know the difference), or hand embroidery.

• Scrapbooking (what to do with all those Poloroids or photo prints).

• Start gardening or become a plant parent. (I grew exactly two peppers and a bunch of basil last summer and couldn’t be more proud.)

• Junk journaling with scraps from daily life, receipts, interesting paper, stickers, etc.

• A Common Place Book, a notebook where you jot down things that catch your attention or are worth remembering later.

• Play dress up. Putting outfits together has become creative expression for me.

• Writing! Hey, look, I’m doing it!

Looking for other ways to enjoy your time offline? Check out these Substack posts I found inspiring:

• You Need a Hobby, Mama - The Rosell Edit, Christina Rosell

• 30 Ways to End Your Night without Your Phone - From Me to You, Nancy Yin

What’s your favorite off-line activity? Will you be trying to spend less time online in 2026?

Leave a comment

The first time I took off work the days between Christmas and New Year’s, I started the year feeling fresh, revitalized, and ready to go!

This year, I ran out of PTO, but even still, the work days will be slower with no meetings, and give me time to pause, reflect, and prepare before Jan. 2 hurtles me back into the hustle and bustle of reality.

I can only create in The Fringe Hours, pockets of time between my life’s priorities, so I must prioritize organization and be proactive with my planning. That’s the only way I can open life up to exploring my creativity.

I’ve made a list in my Common Place Book of tasks I can do during these slower days to set me up for more creative hours in the year ahead, and the best part is that I can do them in my pajamas!

My Twixtmas Wish List

There’s no aggressive goal-getting or New Year’s Resolution. Twixtmas is about calm preparation, not hustle. Here’s my collection of tasks created to nurture my future self.

Technology

• A fresh 2026 folder on my computer, ready for what’s next.

• An inbox that feels lighter—old emails archived, sent items organized, large files deleted.

• New email folders created in advance for upcoming projects.

• A dedicated space to save kudos, kind words, and compliments.

• Time to send thank-you notes to people who made a difference last year.

• All outstanding expense reports are submitted.

• A decluttered phone and drive—unused apps and files cleared away.

• Chargers ready in all the right places–even if that means buying duplicates.

Professional

• A solid to-do list to help me remember where I left off.

• A documented list of projects I’m proud of.

• An updated resume and LinkedIn profile.

• A fresh headshot and an updated Teams photo.

• A video-call setup that helps me look and feel my best—good lighting included.

• Ideas for professional development and dates noted.

Time & Calendar

• A thoughtful review of how I spend my time.

• Fewer, better meetings—reassessing or releasing recurring meetings.

• Intentional networking moments: coffee, lunch, or one-on-ones.

• PTO clearly blocked and officially submitted.

• Focus time protected for projects, reports, and presentations.

• A fresh wall calendar for the family key dates, birthdays, and anniversaries noted.

Family & Relationships

• Family commitments planned with care.

• School events, hobbies, and activities clearly noted.

• Childcare or pet care thoughtfully arranged for school breaks and travel.

• Important dates visible and shared with my family.

• Birthdays remembered and celebrated.

• Gratitude texts sent for holiday cards received.

• Time set aside for the relationships I want to nurture—old friends, extended family, and meaningful date nights.

Health & Wellness

• Medical and dental appointments scheduled.

• Checkups planned for kids and pets.

• Prescriptions refilled and medicine cabinets stocked.

• FSA balances reviewed and receipts submitted.

• Space to explore what supports my wellbeing—meditation, a new fitness class, or even a library card.

• Plenty of rest and permission to move at a gentler pace.

• A new wintry-themed library book to romanticize the cold, dark season.

Home & Spaces

• A clean, cleared desk and workspace..

• Equipment that works well—comfortable chair, reliable mouse, good lighting.

• A home “launchpad” where keys, bags, coats, and essentials live.

• Shopping returns handled.

• Dry cleaning dropped off and picked up.

• A closet edit that leaves only what fits and feels good.

• A charity drop off to declutter my house.

• A fridge and freezer stocked and ready.

• A healthy meal prepared and frozen for busy days.

• Christmas decor put away, but leaving a few sparkles and twinkle lights to give light and wonder to dreary January.

Travel & Commuting

• Travel documents checked and up to date.

• TSA PreCheck scheduled.

• Transit and toll balances confirmed.

• A well-maintained car—washed, serviced, and road-ready.

• A stocked travel toiletry kit, ibuprofen, breath freshener, a hair brush, and lip balm.

• New podcasts or audiobooks queued up.

• Functional luggage or a great backpack or work tote.

• A little cash in my glovebox, just in case.

I know I won’t get to all of these tasks, but having a list will direct my free time and even if a few are done, that’s okay by me.

Merry Twixtmas to all and to all a good night!

What’s your ideal Twixtmas? What else would you add to this list?

Leave a comment

Give me the good stuff. Tell me about the artist.

Show me their studio. What did they wear? Who were their friends? Describe their creative process. Did they have rituals? Where did they live? What tools did they use? How did they find the time? What wisdom do they offer the rest of us?

How did they do it? Because maybe that means I can do it, too.

Perhaps one aspirational day I will persist longer than a few minutes observing the art on the New York Times’ 10-Minute Challenge, but for today, I am content to follow my genuine curiosity.

Give me a documentary, memoir, photograph, interview, about the artist. I want to empathize with their human experience.

Learning from an artist’s life is more attainable than replicating their masterpiece.

Where I sit today as a busy, working mom/wife/friend/daughter/sister, I need the inspiration to stop scrolling my phone, prioritize the time, and create.

Want to join me on a virtual voyeuristic stroll through the lives of artists? Following are some spaces and memoirs I have enjoyed visiting:

Earnest Hemingway, Writer and Legend

• The Hemingway Home & Museum, Key West, FL - His studio in the back guest house where he wrote while standing due to pain was my favorite part except for the famous six-toed cats who run the place.

• A Moveable Feast, could there be a more magical time and place for an artist to imagine than 1920s Paris? The atmosphere is cozy, romantic, and congenial. Published after his death by suicide, the book suggests nostalgia for a simpler time before he peaked in fame and fortune. I envision the two versions of Hemingway, young and old, looking upon each other with envy.

• Check out my last post inspired by his advice, “Write one true sentence ….”

Louis Bromfield, Pulitzer Prize Winning Author

• The Big House at Malabar Farm, Lucas, OH - With its sweeping green hills, how could you not feel inspired? The area is literally known as Pleasant Valley. He filled the home with souvenirs from his travels and entertained Hollywood celebrities who, no doubt, were surprised at Ohio’s natural beauty. Don’t miss the nearby Ceely Rose House for a true-crime thrill.

Thomas Hart Benton

• The Thomas Hart Benton Home & Studio, Kansas City, MO - Benton was known for flowing, colorful paintings of Midwestern life. He studied in New York and Paris, but made his home in the heart of the U.S. He died in his studio, and a few people in our group felt the chills when we toured that particular space.

Anne Rice, Author of Southern Vampire and Witch Series

• New Orlean’s historic Garden District was the scene for the house described in the Mayfair Witch book. There are plenty of free walking tours to guide your way. The French Quarter is the center of the city’s lore, and the voodoo or ghost tour can’t be missed.

On my travel list:

• Frida Kahlo’s bright blue home and studio, Casa Azul

• Julia Child’s home and working kitchen, La Pitchoune

• Claude Monet’s garden and famous blue kitchen in Giverney

• Georgia O’Keeffe’s desert inspiration at Ghost Ranch

• An unintrusive drive-by of Stephen King’s Victorian mansion.

Plus, all the homes in the book, Artist in Residence, by Melissa Wyse. If I’m honest, I wish this book had photographs instead of illustrations, but I guess this is me, again, being more interested in the real thing than the creative expression.

Speaking of reading, Daily Rituals: Women at Work by Mason Currey outlines the lives of artists of all kinds.

This New York Times’ column features artists and tastemakers and how they spend their Sundays. I don’t think they publish them anymore, but there’s a nice archive to peruse.

What other artist-in-real-life inspiration belongs on this list?

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I bought the book, gave it a go, couldn’t do it perfectly, then gave up. Start. Stop. Feel like a failure.

There are very good reasons for completing The Artist’s Way to the letter. No argument there, but for those of us who feel called and just need to get going, granting some allowances was key for me.

On my second, or maybe third attempt, I committed to the practice even when I couldn’t do it perfectly, and it worked.

Don’t tell Julia Cameron, but here’s what worked for me.

#1: Released the expectation of sequential weeks.

Whenever I’ve attempted a healthy habit, inevitably, momentum is halted. Whether it’s by my own motivation waning, forces outside my control, or any myriad of convenient excusesI have too often allowed a break the streak and ruin everything.

So, I decided I’d just keep going, no matter what interruption came my way.

#2: Used a completely non-special notebook.

I loooooooove a notebook. The problem is, if they are too special, they sit on an aspirational shelf instead of getting sullied by my real-life use. My unfiltered, stream-of-consciousness blah blah blah did not feel worthy of such a fine vessel, so I bought a dollar-store composition notebook instead.

No pressure, no big investment, just unpretentious, wide-ruled pages ready for me to do the work. What it lacked in aesthetics, it made up for with deliciously crunchy paper.

#3: Focused on the practice of Morning Pages, not the length.

Once I had my completely non-special notebook, now I had three, 8.5X11(ish) pages to fill each morning. Three long pages, and only about 30 minutes of time in my morning.

I just couldn’t get it done. I’d drift off and stare into space–which is not a bad thing for a creative practice. So, I allowed myself space and released the assignment of three, full pages, and made the practice of journaling every morning a habit. It worked then and it’s worked ever since.

#4: Spiral bound the book.

It was cheap, quick, and easy to take my book to an office supply story and get my book spiral bound. Now, it feels more like a workbook. It stays open, lays flat, or doubles over to give me more space.

#5: Loosely interpreted artists’ dates.

I did artists dates, just not every week and not always alone. When I took my daughter to the art museum, I counted it. If we went to the movies as a family, I counted that, too.

I maintain a list of suggestions so I can incorporate whimsy and adventure into my life.

And with that, I made it through the 12-week program in maybe 15 or so weeks. Was it imperfect? Yeah. Did it work? Also, yeah.

Have you tried The Artist’s Way? Did you quit like I did?

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I didn’t call a Common Place Book when I carried around a little notebook I was gifted in a stationery set I received for Christmas from my grandparents when I was 13ish. I didn’t learn about Common Place Notebooks until recently.

A Common Place Book is a tool for remembering the seemingly insignificant-but-interesting things that we’re likely to forget, and likely will forget, until we flip through the pages of the book in some future destination. Many of our favorite artists attended this practice.

As I skim the pages of my first Common Place Book, I see formative thoughts that imprinted themselves into my psyche.

There are few original thoughts in this little notebook of mine, but here’s what’s in it:

• Favorite quotes; some from a book at my Granmary’s house, media, or magazine clippings.

• Funny ideas like the 1990s edition of a “Deep Thoughts” calendar inspired by a Saturday Night Live sketch that hung in my room.

• Lists of goals and wishes.

• Potential girl and boy baby names, including the name of my daughter who would be born 20 years later.

• Scrawlings from other teenagers. Some of my favorites are from my soul brother, Paul, who wrote in his distinct, quirky, handwriting. Other quotes are from a lovely theater friend, Thomas, who wrote in beautiful script, and I remember fondly even though we’ve lost touch.

Unlike the other childhood-into-teenage journals that I short-sightedly tossed decades ago, my first Common Place Book contained no secrets, so I was free to keep it with me and that’s the key. (I keep my unfiltered Morning Pages thoughts safe at home unless I’m traveling.)

Other successful attempts were tiny notebooks I kept in my car for capturing random ideas, to-dos, or learnings from podcasts or audiobooks. My phone’s notes app often fulfills this purpose but in a more action-oriented way–less whimsical and lacking the satisfying crinkle of a notebook page.

Regardless, I always feel the spark of curiosity when I return to their messy pages.

Today I am starting an experiment! My current Common Place Notebook is coming with me on a work trip and conference. I’m going to carry it around just as I did as a teenager, and rebuild the habit of capturing ideas for my future self.

Inside the front cover, I wrote Joan Didion’s passage from Slouching Toward Bethlehem, which I’m currently studying:

What would you or do you write in your own Common Place Book?

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I cannot get into a creative mindset, if my mind is buzzing, my shoulders are tense, and I am frazzled with busyness and household clutter.

And because no one knows how to nurture me other than, well, me, I have made Rest Rituals a priority–-especially on my most harried days.

On those days, when I’m dragging myself through the door after a long day and commute, I take a few minutes to set the scene for my eventual reward: REST.

My evening Rest Rituals:

• Get comfortable. Take off my jewelry, put my hair up, change into my house slippers. Sometimes I change clothes or strip down and put on my robe.

• Treat myself to hotel-style turndown service. Fold down the sheets, straighten the pillows, and make my bed in the most inviting way possible. In the winter, I switch on a heating pad for my feet.

• Tidy my nightstand. This involves straightening the books I’ve picked through the night before, closing the drawer, and generally making it less chaotic.

• Light a candle in the bedroom. This is usually something seasonal, and it helps set the stage for rest.

• Switch the TV to ambience. YouTube has endless choices for a lovely scene and soft music. I enjoy seasonal ambience like snow or ocean waves. The ambience for sleep is less likely to be interrupted by ads.

• Cool down the room. In the winter, I open the patio door and in the summer, I turn down the A/C. A cooler room helps me sleep.

• Take a bath or shower. In the winter, a hot bath is a relief for taking the chill from my hands and feet. I turn on the heater, light a candle, dim the lights, and threaten my family within an inch of their lives to stay out. In the summer, a quick shower feels so refreshing to wash the makeup off my face and the day out of my bones.

• Elaborate skincare routine. This often feels like a chore. Wiser people would say that I should infuse positive intentions in the process. Sure, but I usually just want to get it done because it’s a barrier in front of downtime. But it’s important to take care of my skin. Here’s the skincare routine I loosely follow.

Even when I’m walking through my bedroom with a laundry basket full of clothes, I enjoy seeing the relaxing space that awaits me as my reward to a good day’s work.

When I finally collapse into bed, I treat myself to guilt-free scrolling, then read a realbook before switching on an audiobook to read me to sleep.

Before I can rest, I need to prepare for my Morning Reset Ritual!

• Prep my coffee maker. This is the first thing I switch on to get caffeine in my veins ASAP.

• Prep my smoothie. I hate doing this, but loving having done it. I have a green smoothie for breakfast each morning, and it actually tastes really good.

• Quick clean the kitchen. Wipe down the counters with an antibacterial wipe, load the dishes into the dishwasher, and remove any clutter.

Related articles you might enjoy:

• Morning Reset Rituals

• Creating a Sleep Bliss Bubble

• My Ingredients for a Cozy Audiobook (with Recommendations)

“My sanity is hanging on by a thread, and that thread is having a peaceful morning alone,” I told my husband.

Lately, he’s been getting up earlier, and just his breathing intrudes on “my time.”

I said that with humor, a gentle way of communicating my needs. He always has a funny, witty comeback. After 20+ years together, he understands my blissful alone time benefits everyone in the family.

The reason I like mornings is because everyone’s asleep. I feel inhibited by the sense of being observed while I’m journaling, meditating, or staring into the void.

Solitude is essential for me.

My Morning Routine generally involves waking at 6 a.m., making coffee and big mason jar of iced water, brushing my teeth, slapping on some moisturizer, and settling in with my Morning Basket of notebooks, books, and other essentials.

My Morning Reset Rituals:

• Setting the stage. I turn on seasonal ambience scene on YouTube. I prefer instrumental music and a seasonal scene. Words distract me.

• Opening my journal. I did “The Artist’s Way” two years ago, and I have managed to maintain a consistent journaling practice ever since, something I aspired to achieve after more than a decade of trying. I finally succeeded when I removed the expectation of completing the requisite three full pages. Using a completely non-special notebook helped me feel more comfortable writing unfiltered and unphilosophically.

• Meditation. Experts say 20 minutes is the optimal number. I do it for as little as five minutes some days. I meditate for inner peace, tapping into my intuition, and to practice quieting my mind. I often wear my LED skincare mask because I am not above vanity, and it’s an effective people repellant. Plus, it has the added benefit of a 10-minute timer.

After this, I should go for a brisk morning walk, and that’s been a part of my routine in the past. I’d be lying if I said I did that today. It remains an aspiration. I’ll report back.

In reality, this is when I make my meal plan, do my grocery list, or complete one of the ten gazillion other tasks that buzz around the mind of a working mom to an active teen.

Before life’s responsibilities consume me, I’ve carved out a little space of peace to start my day centered.

I love hearing about morning routines. Tell me about yours!

Related articles you might enjoy:

• Evening Rest Rituals

• Creating a Sleep Bliss Bubble

I woke up at 5 a.m. this morning feeling a sense of purpose.

I made a wish last night for the September new moon, my 46th birthday month. My wish was/is to create art in a way that’s true to me and for me. To build something independent of my day job. What? I’m not sure yet, but it’s been a persistent thought for a while now.

So here I sit, in the darkness of a pre-dawn Monday, dutifully writing my Morning Pages, free-flowing thoughts on paper a la Julia Cameron, when a message came to me:

JUST START WRITING.

B-b-b-but the business woman in me needs a plan! A well-researched and highly strategic business plan. Goal! Objectives! KPIs!

These represent the ingredients for supremely logical procrastination. Who could argue?

The thing is, this project isn’t logical. I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m letting my inner artist lead the way. She’s always here, but I don’t let her play very much.

And that’s when my friend, Hem, joins me on the couch. He offers to pour something strong into my coffee. No, thanks. He says something inappropriate that makes me laugh because irreverence and inappropriate humor is always funny to me when it’s not mean.

I’m not scrawling philosophically in a notebook in a 1920s Parisian cafe as Hemingway might have been when he wrote this advice. I’m not inspired after a night socializing with artists and eccentrics at a salon in Gertrude Stein’s apartment. I’m a working mom/wife/friend/daughter/sister/aunt/neighbor whose child has reached a level of independence that opens up a light of possibility for me, more time, more energy.

Will anyone read this? That’s not even the point, but if you are here with me, my intention is that this will make your inner artist feel a little more free. Just as writing this has allowed my inner artist to come out and play for a little while.

What does your inner artist want to do?

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Facing off in today’s Morning Pages, my fear of being seen.

As I settled into my morning routine, coffee in hand, dog at my side, basket of all my special things, including my totally, non-special journal (more on that later), I had the thought: maybe I should use a pen name. My name isn’t common; people who know me can make the connection. How embarrassing!

A pen name is safe. A pen name is anonymous.

Yes! With a pen name, nobody will see my writings. No one will find my name during a job interview and see my inner thoughts. My coworkers will never know. I’ll be protected from friends and foes, anyone who might point an evil eye in my direction.

My Morning Pages, in their infinite wisdom, are not having it.

FEEL CRINGEY AND DO IT ANYWAY.

Morning Pages are where my lesser feelings, fear, worry, judgement, meet their match. It is a direct confrontation of ego-driven, human weakness with the strength of inner knowing and guidance. I believe it’s a higher power a.k.a. God. You can call it what you like.

I’ve always liked that my name is unique; it’s like my personal trademark. No last name needed most of the time. It’s me: Jacy. I joke that I answer to Stacy, Tracy, Lacy, Jason, and adjacent (hence, the name of this Substack.)

I have a big personality, love me or hate me, and whether or not I like it, I was meant to be seen. Just as you are, and just as all dear souls are meant to be their unique and weird and wonderful selves.

If you’re reading this, know I still feel cringey, but I’m doing it anyway. I hope you do, too.

Let’s make our art. What’s something you want to do but won’t because it’s cringey?